Is it Possible to Have a Relationship After Infidelity?
Recovering from infidelity is hard. After someone has an affair, it seems as if the trust you once had is completely and irreversibly broken. There is no question about that. You don’t want to end the relationship, but at the same time, there is a rift in the relationship you once had. Moving forward seems impossible, but you desperately want to try.
It’s not easy to process an affair and simultaneously want to continue a relationship. Whether you are the partner who strayed or the one cheated on, it can cause conflicting emotions in your brain. Moving forward after an affair is something that can be done. While it will be a challenge and requires work for both partners, it is possible to continue. Here are some ways that recovery after an affair is possible.
Remember, It Takes Time
Recovering from an affair doesn’t just happen overnight. It would be wonderful if you could just wave a magic wand and undo all the hurt and pain that the affair caused. Unfortunately, like so much else in life, it isn’t something that can just be reversed easily. Recovery from an affair takes time. Rushing the process of moving on after an affair can cause even more damage and harm to the relationship.
In a way, you can look at recovering after an affair as a grief process. You are mourning the loss of the relationship you thought you had. You are likely cycling through a process of sadness, anger, denial, and hurt. None of these feelings can easily be rushed through or forgotten. So if you are hurting after an affair, remember that it’s okay to take your time in processing everything you are feeling right now. However, recovering is possible. It may not ever return to how it was before the affair, but you can build the foundation to be strong again.
Trust Will Take Time Too
If you are the partner who had an affair, understand that the trust your partner once had in you has been broken. If you are the partner who was cheated on, you have every right not to be trusting right now. You can begin rebuilding the relationship and the foundation, but that doesn’t always mean there is trust. While trust can be regained in a relationship, it’s important to remember that this will take time, too.
Be Honest With One Another
There are so many emotions that float around after the relationship has been tested this way. Right now, there is no time for anything but honesty if you truly want to rebuild the relationship.
For the partner who cheated, trust can be gained by being open about what happened and why, whether that was solely from temptation, unhappiness with the relationship, or something else. The cheating partner must be upfront about why this happened, no matter how hard it is to admit.
For the partner who was cheated on, explain how this made you feel. Be honest and upfront with how hurt and angry you genuinely are. When the trust in a relationship has been broken, moving forward can mean being as honest as possible to heal from the wounds it has created.
It’s Okay If You Can’t Figure It Out On Your Own
After an affair, it’s really hard to try to figure out a way to move forward. When infidelity happens, it’s okay to admit that you need support and guidance. Couples therapy can help you learn how to build the foundation again and move forward with your partner. Let’s connect when you are ready to begin this process.
