How Does Internal Family Systems Therapy Work?
Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapy is a type of psychotherapy that views the mind as a system of multiple parts, each with its own role and function. These parts can be helpful or hurtful, and IFS therapy aims to help you understand and manage them. This way, you get to know different parts of yourself, like they’re members of your internal family. It might initially sound odd, but IFS helps you understand yourself in a different light.
Getting to Know Your Different Subpersonalities
Internal Family Systems Therapy believes our psyche comprises many subpersonalities or “parts.” These parts serve a purpose and contain emotions, memories, and beliefs. Some parts may be childlike, critical, anxious, and carefree.
Getting to know your parts is key to IFS. Spend time observing how certain feelings or thoughts activate different parts of you. For example, notice how interacting with a critical friend may activate your anxious part while going out for drinks activates your fun-loving part.
Once you start to recognize your parts, get curious about them. Try asking them questions like: What’s your role? What do you want me to know? Are you trying to protect me from something? The answers can be illuminating.
Don’t judge your parts as “good” or “bad.” Each part has a positive intent, even if their strategies create problems. You aim to understand them and determine how they can work together harmoniously.
With practice, you’ll get better at accessing different parts on purpose. You may find that calling on your confident part helps reduce anxiety in social situations or that tapping into your creative part ignites inspiration. Gradually, you’ll strengthen connections between the different parts. Thisis the power of Internal Family Systems Therapy.
Understanding the Internal Family Systems Model
The IFS model conceptualizes that we are multifaceted human beings and that many parts comprise a whole. These parts can be emotions, beliefs, memories, or even physiological sensations. IFS therapy aims to restructure interactions between these parts to achieve harmony and balance.
Parts: The parts are fragments of your personality that serve a purpose, like protecting you from painful emotions or difficult life events. However, these parts can sometimes act in extreme, disruptive ways.
Self: At your core is a wise, calm, compassionate Self — aware of all the parts and how they interact. The Self remains detached yet curious, seeking to understand each part’s motivations and concerns.
Healing the Parts: The therapist helps you strengthen yourself to engage with the parts calmly and objectively. Through dialogue, the Self can understand each part’s concerns and unmet needs. The Self then reassures the parts, addressing their fears and establishing healthier roles and interactions between them.
The Process of IFS Therapy
Reconnecting with Your Parts
IFS therapy begins by helping you identify the different “parts” of yourself — the voices, roles, and behaviors you’ve developed to navigate life’s challenges. Some parts may be protective, while others yearn to be vulnerable. Some parts may be reactive, while others remain calm. The therapist guides you to get to know each part, understand its intentions, and build compassion for the role it serves.
Unburdening Painful Parts
Once you’ve connected with a part, the therapist helps you access any painful memories or emotions it may hold. This is known as “unburdening” — releasing pent-up hurt, fear, shame, or sadness. Unburdening parts of their distress helps them relax, open up, and become less reactive or disruptive. It allows them to transform into valuable allies.
Harmonizing the Self
As parts release their burdens, your essential Self — the core of your being becomes clearer and stronger. The Self is curious, calm, compassionate, and confident. It appreciates all your parts and helps them work together harmoniously. The ultimate goal of IFS is a peaceful, empowered Self that can lead your parts with wisdom and grace.
IFS is an innovative approach to therapy that has helped many people on their mental health journey. If you want to learn more about IFS, contact our office today.
