Healing After Heartbreak: Seeking Support in the Midst of Divorce
A big life change like a divorce can make it feel like your entire world was flipped upside down.
Regardless of who made the final decision or if it was a joint agreement, navigating life during a divorce isn’t easy. You may even feel like you’re riding an emotional rollercoaster. One day, you feel content with what’s happening. On other days, you may feel sad, bitter, and angry.
All of these emotions are valid and normal. If you’re struggling with healing after heartbreak, rest assured that it is possible. Here’s how to seek support in the midst of going through a divorce.
Take Care of Yourself
It can be easy to dismiss your wants and needs while going through a divorce. You may be focused on other things like sorting through your shared belongings, trying to find a new home, or trying to find a resolution towards custody agreements if you shared children or pets.
While all of these things are also extremely important, so is taking care of yourself. Taking care of yourself means doing the things that meet your basic human needs. These include eating healthy and well-balanced meals during your day, drinking enough water, and aiming to get at least eight hours of sleep each night. Taking care of yourself ensures that your body and brain are operating at their best so that you can, too.
Lean On Your Loved Ones
Support is extremely important, especially during challenging times. While you may want to pull away and withdraw from loved ones during this time, this can actually make things worse. Let your loved ones in. Tell them what you need from them during this time so that they can show up to support you. You may want someone to just be there with you. Maybe you’re looking for a healthy distraction or a shoulder to cry on. You may even feel ready to talk about what happened and how you’re feeling. Make sure you’re setting up time to continue being social.
Focus On You
Before your divorce, your time was split between yourself and your partner. Now, you can invest in yourself. While the transition from a “we” and “us” perspective to an “I” or “me” may be difficult, it’s important to take this time to find yourself again. Try to get back to yourself and your ownwants and needs. Implement a new self-care routine. Explore different activities or hobbies that you may have had before your relationship or may be interested in now.
Don’t Jump Into a New Relationship
After a divorce, you may feel like you have to jump into a new relationship to prove to yourself, your ex, and others that you’re doing okay. First, you will be okay. Try not to jump into a new relationship, especially before you’ve had the time to process your last one. Use this time to figure out your wants and needs. You can also take pieces from your past relationship of what worked versus what didn’t work. Now is the perfect time to focus on yourself and determine what you’re looking for next.
Seek Additional Support
No matter how much of a support system you have, or what you’re doing to take care of yourself, sometimes these things can’t replace the advice and support of meeting with a licensed and trained mental health professional. Going to therapy can be a great outlet for people going through divorce. A therapist will help you take the steps to navigate this new life so that you can look forward to the future. Reach out today to set up an initial consultation.
